{"id":896,"date":"2015-01-19T17:20:46","date_gmt":"2015-01-19T17:20:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/?p=896"},"modified":"2015-04-14T21:33:39","modified_gmt":"2015-04-14T21:33:39","slug":"things-will-never-be-the-same","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/things-will-never-be-the-same\/","title":{"rendered":"Things will never be the same"},"content":{"rendered":"<h2>Things will never be the same<\/h2>\n<p>It\u2019s the end of an era here at the Catskill Mountain News. This week\u2019s paper marks the last one on the job for jack-of-all-trades Esther Snyder of Roxbury.<\/p>\n<p>At a few years north of the traditional retirement age, Esther will be stepping down from her twice-a-week chores as typesetter\/proofreader\/obituary editor. I doubt, however, that she\u2019ll be slowing down much.<\/p>\n<p>As noted, Esther has worn several hats in her quarter-century of work at the News \u2014 her second career after an even longer stint performing office duties at Roxbury Central School. Back in the \u201colden times\u201d there was plenty of type to be set here, as most news items arrived via the post office. As the trend of e-mailing news rose, Esther shifted her focus more to proofreading duties.\u2028Anyone who has ever proofread knows that this is a thankless task. In the office, there are plenty of comments like, \u201cWow, glad you caught that one before it made its way into print!\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>A few always slip past<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Unfortunately, there are always some typographical errors that elude every set of eyes that glances over them. Despite the fact that the errors originated on someone else\u2019s keyboard, the proofreader is a common fall-guy\/girl.<\/p>\n<p>As much as I would like to blame others for my typos, I have a hard time pinning my mistakes on Esther. Oddly enough, Esther takes care of this task for me. You see, even though she\u2019s already read the entire paper, she does so again with final product. The following week, she\u2019s fond of saying, \u201cDid you see the error(s) that got in?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Being a big fan of \u201cignorance is bliss,\u201d I usually am unaware of the typo(s) that Esther is about to point out. Naturally, I am thankful for her sharing the knowledge that these errors made their way into print. Forever.<\/p>\n<p>Along with plain, old-fashioned typos, she politely points out common grammatical errors to the writing staff. Esther makes certain that the comments being delivered are not actually coming from her, but from \u201cMr. Webster.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>Wrote the book on it<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Ironically, after 25-plus years on the job, Esther has no real need to refer to Webster\u2019s dictionary \u2014 she has compiled her own volume of notes regarding certain spellings, rules for hyphenating, etc. For instance, are you aware that \u201cfirehouse\u201d is one word? We weren\u2019t either. Until Esther corrected this mistake numerous times.<\/p>\n<p>And speaking of the aforementioned hyphens, I love them like I love baseball \u2014 but Esther is not nearly as fond of these little devices. I\u2019m not taking that last one out, however.<\/p>\n<p>She\u2019s also a stickler for the proper spelling of names. I\u2019m willing to bet that she knows how to spell the first and last names of just about every man, woman and child in the Town of Roxbury. Her diligence in this department has saved countless errors over the years.<\/p>\n<p>I noted above that Esther was the obituary editor. This was an unofficial title, but well-earned. Of all stories in the paper, Esther has always had a grave concern about errors in obituaries. She is always very respectful of the dignity of an obituary. These pieces are no place for mistakes \u2014 or puns like \u201cgrave concern.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>Bringing back the past<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Being from the \u201cold school,\u201d Esther grew up reading this paper when it was dominated by \u201csocial\u201d news about the comings and goings of neighbors. That side of the paper has been in steady decline for many years and has largely disappeared.<\/p>\n<p>However, Esther has done her part to keep such news alive. When the scarce amount of news to be typeset is finished, she often \u201cheads downstairs\u201d to make some calls to see if anyone in her community is interested in sharing their activities in The Roxbury News.<\/p>\n<p>Esther\u2019s diligence usually nabs a few folks, but there aren\u2019t many residents who participate. I like to joke that Esther\u2019s persistence has spurred an avalanche of Roxbury residents opting for Caller ID.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s only natural that Esther wants to see the news she has collected make its way into the paper, but when it\u2019s tight, this column sometimes gets left out. I like to remind Esther that she could ensure The Roxbury News makes it into print, if some \u201cAndrew Jacksons\u201d make their way to my wallet. Darned if she didn\u2019t track down a supply of counterfeit mini-Jacksons that she funnels to me upon request. They are hard to spend, but I appreciate her effort.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Late-night writing<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Esther\u2019s day doesn\u2019t end when she leaves the office, either. She often arrives and tells us she was up until the wee hours \u2014 writing letters. In fact, her letter-writing volume is so legendary, I think she may single-handedly be keeping the post office afloat.<\/p>\n<p>Over all the years, Esther\u2019s quirky personality has spawned many memories. I think the one that will always stick with me occurred several years ago when her car was in the shop and she borrowed a family member\u2019s Monster Truck for a few days. I\u2019m not sure how she got in or out of this hulking, mud-covered beast, but she did.<\/p>\n<p>Plus, there were mechanical problems with the Monster Truck, as well, and I believe she could drive only in second gear. I\u2019m sure that cut down on her opportunity for doing some donuts in the cornfield on the way home.<\/p>\n<p>I could go on and on about my years with Esther as co-worker and friend. Anyone who knows her is aware of Esther\u2019s devotion \u2014 to family, friends and newspaper readers.<\/p>\n<p>Even though she won\u2019t be coming into the office each week, I\u2019m sure we\u2019ll be able to keep tabs on her by reading The Roxbury News \u2014 as long as the Jacksons keep flowing, of course. Thank you, Esther \u2014 I sure hope there are no typos in this piece.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u2014 Brian Sweeney<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/portfolio\/catching-some-porch-time\/\"><span style=\"color: #3366ff;\"><em>(Return to Humorous Columns&#8230;)<\/em><\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Things will never be the same It\u2019s the end of an era here at the Catskill Mountain News. This week\u2019s paper marks the last one on the job for jack-of-all-trades Esther Snyder of Roxbury. At a few years north of the traditional retirement age, Esther will be stepping down from her twice-a-week chores as typesetter\/proofreader\/obituary&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-896","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-copywriting-samples"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/896","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=896"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/896\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1057,"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/896\/revisions\/1057"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=896"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=896"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/locustgroveenterprises.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=896"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}